What Kind of Man are You?
When does a man look like? You can ask that question to the experts of manliness (whoever they might be), pastors, women, and other men, and chances are you would get lots of varying answers. Some thoughts might be that a man is broad shouldered, self-confident, committed to his purpose, controls his emotions, doesn’t cry and is a good provider. Agree or disagree?
Let me ask you another question. What does a godly man look like? Now, don’t run and look at yourself in a mirror to answer that question. Think about it, what does a godly man look like? Don’t know? I’m not sure I do either.
In his book Men of Courage, Dr. Larry Crabb writes about “released manhood”. He encourages the reader to think about masculinity as an energy, a natural momentum within the heart of every man, a power and an urge to move into life in a particular way. Dr. Crabb goes on to write that men who suppress this energy are ungodly men, while men who live with this energy released are considered godly.
To help us understand what Dr. Crabb is saying, he uses the illustration of two kinds of men: inauthentic and authentic. We will unpack this more in the coming weeks, but some characteristics of each are:
Inauthentic men are controlling, destructive, selfish. They trust no one and are not good listeners. Inauthentic men are powerless, angry, and terrified; being this kind of man has adverse effects on your relationships, your marriage, and your children. Now I have been this man in my life and in some ways I still am. It took going through one of the most trying times of my life to realize I need to change and move from an inauthentic man to an authentic man.
An authentic man is an active man who is more concerned with developing a strength others can enjoy rather than achieving power and control for himself. An authentic man is gentle. Not weak, but gentle. Finally, an authentic man is a purposeful man. He knows why and what he is living for.
So, what kind of man are you? Inauthentic or authentic? This isn’t a question to take lightly, but one for us to think about. This week I challenge you to think about this and honestly answer for yourself, what kind of man am I?