From Tame your Fears

From the book "Tame your Fears" by Carol Kent. This page-full of material is very helpful to determine if fear plagues your life...but nobody knows it!

SIX DISGUISES OF FEAR

Many of us have lived behind our disguises for so long we hardly recognize that fear motivates many of our destructive behaviors. I have, at times, starred in all the roles in the play “The Six Disguises of Fear”. Sometimes my performances have been worthy of standing ovations. One role could have brought me an Oscar. The beginning of positive change comes when we leave our costumes in the dressing room after admitting to one of the following roles:

1. A perfectionist lifestyle: “If I can please all of the people in my life with flawless behavior and control everything and everyone around me, I won’t have to admit my deep insecurities and fears.”

2. A possessive nature: “If I can protect the people I love the most by establishing the borders of their activities and guarding the dimensions of their interactions with other people, I will safeguard them from fearful experiences.”

3. A picky attitude: “If I can criticize someone else, I will look better. I won’t have to admit that it makes me feel like a bigger and less fearful person when I put somebody else’s personality or methods down in order to secure my own position.”

4. A pretentious faith: “If I make a list of what real Christians do and don’t do and show people my saintliness in action, perhaps I can cover up my fears, which are usually expressed through pride, inflexibility, legalism, and condemnation of ‘less godly’ people.”

5. A passionate workaholism: “If I invest my total energy in worthy causes and/or work hard enough to earn the approval of my superiors, I’ll be too tired to worry about my fears. If I just keep busy enough with my family responsibilities and personal activities, I won’t have to acknowledge the ache inside of me and admit that I don’t know how to give or receive love.”

6. A plastic smile: “If I look like a trusting person, soon I’ll feel like a trusting person. When I’m confused and afraid, I just keep smiling, especially at church, because most of those people expect me to be spiritually mature – and they are the last people I would admit my fears to!”